I see it on the Body for Life guestbook all the time. The message from the newbie usually goes like this:
“I am really desperate to get fit. I can’t believe I have let myself go so far. I’ve got to do this now. HELP!!!
If our newbie only knew exactly how appropriate the word desperate was for his or her situation! The dictionary definition of desperation is:
“state of reckless behavior due to despair.”

And that is exactly what happens. The desperate newbies, out of recklessness, do not read the book thoroughly; they plan poorly or not at all; they crash diet, eating fitfully and poorly and without the energy to support the changes they want; they begin exercising without any clue of what they are doing; and soon enough they are either discouraged, or injured or out of energy, or all of these!

Why do they do this? Because it at least feels like they are finally doing something. See, most people who come here in desperation have lived much of their lives in that mode. They don’t know how to live proactively and to set and achieve goals in an organized manner. So, they simply let everything go until it reaches a crisis mode or dies of neglect. This is true for everything pretty much, but especially of things they don’t find naturally enjoyable. This is why students cram for tests; this is why toothaches always occur on weekends; this is why people are suddenly shocked to find that their expenses exceed their incomes.

Can desperate people be helped or will they just be here in roman candle mode, going from a bright shining ball of fire to small glob of ashes in just a moment? Well, it depends on whether they can catch one really important idea and understand the truth of it. Here is is:

DESPERATION IS NOT A SUITABLE SUBSTITUTE FOR PREPARATION, INFORMATION, AND PERSPIRATION—FROM WHICH FLOWS MOTIVATION!

See, what works to change poor habits and to produce concrete results is careful preparation, which means setting goals and readying yourself for the 12 week journey; thorough information, which comes from reading the book and understanding the process of what you are about to undertake; and perspiration, which is hard work in both the dieting and the exercise parts of this 12 week journey. After you do those things for a time, you’ll see some results, gain some confidence and then you’ll have motivation! You have to invest in your challenge before you will truly want to continue to do it. People always have this principle backwards. They confuse desperation with motivation, and they think it will carry them to the finish line. But true motivation comes from right actions not vice versa. That’s why listening to motivational speakers is not enough. It is the miracle of the moment and as soon as the speech is over the motivation begins to fade. To get lasting motivation you have to begin the behavior changes you want so badly.

As they say in the twelve step groups: “You have to act your way into better thinking instead of trying to think your way into better actions!”

So, if you are a desperate newbie, or you’re talking to one, be sure to remind yourself or the one you’re talking to that actions produce appropriate positive feelings and that desperation and all the recklessness that comes from it simply leads to a more spectacular failure.